Shawn

2006-08-11T21:44:00.000-07:00

k.. this is to u.. dear.. i noe u feel stress about everything now.. yur life.. yur studies yur family health.. and us.. i shall give u time to cool down k.. i realli worry about u.. now if u see me i tink u wun regconise me.. i slim dwn 2 kg!! and my face is thin.. due to i'm sick.. i am sick ever since u left me stun that day when u suddenly hung up on me.. and stressed due to yur father's illness.. i wish him a speedy recovery i realli do.. i tot alot about the stuffs u said and the stuffs i said.. it made me cry alot u noe.. its been so long i ever cry that much.. i lost all motivation to do anything anymore.. cos u are my light.. my pathway to a better life.. now without yur presence i'm just a fish in a sea.. aimlessly and lonely.. no amount of games or friends or even beautiful woman can cheer me up now.. cos all i realli want now is you... u r my light, my will to live my.. everything.. u stepped in mylife and lived a mark.. it will nv be washed away.. u rem yur promised? u will give me wad i lack during my childhood? the warmth and all those stuff i lacked.. u will give me? i'm not stressing u.. u noe.. i said i will give u time.. but pls.. if u wish to be alone.. dun ignore me.. ignore my calls.. my msges.. it hurts like hell u noe? to u.. it may seem nth.. but to me.. u noe it's like the end of the world.. now the fewlin i'm having is like.. i canot breathe.... i'm always at the usual spot waiting for yur arrival.. even if i'm not there.. u will sense my presence i noe u will.. cos we r mirror after all.. i noe u dun wish to tell me everything is due to not stressing me.. but do u noe.. by not telling me.. and allow me to tink elsewhere.. i'm more stress? right now i'm even suffering from somthing i canot describe.. i'm dizzy keep vomitting.. and i can;t eat or slp well.. when i slp i kept whispering yur name.. when i open my eyes its always tears.. the feeling is worse den death.. the ring is still hanging on my neck.. i will nv remove it till i lie 6 inches below u noe.. i did promise that b4.. i realli miss u alot.. i wana cherish u i hope u will still cherish me.. i noe i'm yur 1st.. but i wish u will love me as much as back den u noe.. my feelings for u nv falter.. i will still run to u if u ask me to.. cos i realli love u.. my vision duno why is fading esp my right eye.. i am scared but i dun dare let u noe.. mayb u wun even read this but i guess i better write it down in case i dun ever have the chance again.. i feel that i am weaker by the day.. i duno how long i can maintain my body till i drop down .. i wish tat b4 i drop i could see u smiling and luffing with me.. biting me as usual.. the silent treatment u gave me is the most painful i ever had in my 20 yers of life.. y wun u let me touch yur life? y u suddenly turn this way? i noe u got yur probelms.. but i could try to help.. u can let me noe yur trouble right? i may not help u right.. but at least i can suffer the pain with u right? it will lighten yur load u noe.. i miss u alot... i duno if u miss me anot.. but right now even in tears i am.. missing u like crazy.. how can u she de let me be like this? sigh.. i realli need u ruby/ hui ling/ ling er/ dear~ i wonder if i lie on the hospital bed will u be there for me when i open my eyes.. u did say b4 u wud'nt leave me if i ever lose my sight right.. rem? at lot 1 that day.. i had been trying to find a field of dandelion for u if u din noe.. cos i rem the 1st time we at the pond.. u said u luv dandelions... my grandpa saw my state guess wad he told my parents? like a sick bird.. he will lose the will to live if the mate nv shows up.. hah.. typical geezer.. scare my parents.. but i duno i realli kinda lost the will to recover.. i 1st time sick for 4 days.. 4 days.. since u last spoke to me.. it felt like 4 months already.. u noe.. fever again.. sigh.. k... i hope u read this.. ruby.. i love you.. u noe it.. deep down yur heart.. right?

2006-08-08T23:58:00.000-07:00

right now.. i am so sad and scared.. cos dear's dad got hospitalised i duno for wad.. but from my heart i am praying he recover.. she is stressed out i duno from what i tink mayb is of me.. i shud not have forced her to celeb her bday with me.. i shud b big hearted abit.. i am such a moron sum times.. but i am just abit pissed cos we agreed on her bday we go beach stayover night.. but now things changed.. nvm ba i guess.. now more impt is her family of course.. i wish her family all healthy of course.. i dun wan her sad also what.. she said she gave up everything.. i am very sad.. does tat mean me too? noo! i dun wana.. i am so sad.. i am sobbin now.. i duno y but i canot control.. tears keep coming out.. i dun wana lose her.. i loved her very deeply.. more deeply den ever b4.. cos my whole family loved her as well.. and i already consider her part of my family.. and i love her for who she is.. i wish she wud not give up.. i wish she wud think carefully.. the birth day most is next year den celeb ba.. dad comes 1st u noe ^^ i wish i could visit him too.. u could lie to him i'm yur fren or anything.. pls.. i realli am worried k.. we r happy together and now u dun wan it? how can tat be? pls... think carefully.. u can keep everything me yur friends yur family.. if u wud aloow it.. u must face the prob instead of running u noe.. sigh.. i willing to face it with u.. or even be yur shield.. and sumtimes yur sword.. if u let me.. if u dun use me i will nv shine.. i am at yur disposal u noe... u must use me!! must make me shine..!! cos i love u.. i will shine for u.. and only YOU u understand? i noe u can feel my heart right.. i wish u could tok to me about yur probs.. now and den.. i wana help u break dwn the probs together.. dat way we can share the burden right.. ^^ tats wad i'm for u noe.. i'm not just sum1 u can hug or kiss.. but i'm also a close buddy u can tok to de.. realli.. just ask me out 1 day i will listen to u all day and advise u.. pls.. dear.. i dun wish to lose you.. and now i updated my blog.. i nv lie to u right.. ^^ dun be stress.. u will do well de.. ^^ ove u always frm 1st july till end of my life

2006-08-04T23:23:00.000-07:00

right now i felt so useless.. dear feeling so sad yet i canot do anything.. she dun wan me to disturb her?!!! sigh!! so i am an outsider now.. i realli felt hurt by the wrds he is the only guy whu noes the true me.. so wad am i?? i am being emotional here.. i noe.. but wad u expect me to feel? happy? its not i dun care.. its just.. i duno wad to say.. right now i felt much lot worse den her.. yet i canot say i dun wana give her stress now that she stress up.. i went to lot 1 bought her a present just now.. i nv ate for 2 weeks just to save enuff for that.. and now she is like very sad.. wad should i do?? how can i help?? i felt so useless.. its like she is shutting herself frm me.. HER boyfriend! .. why?! I felt angry and disappointed at the same time.. this feelin.. i tot i will never have it again.. y she wana hide frm me.. i'm only 2nd to her friends.. i dun mind initally.. but now is like.. i am a total stranger to her now.. am i thinking too much or just that i am totally breaking down? Looking at the gifts i just bought.. tears brim my eyes.. i am so angry.. not with her.. but myself.. why did i shout at her yest?! i prepare to make a deal with the devil himself to extend her grandma life span even if it means take mine aways for 1 yr or 2.. i just dunwana see her like this.. it pains me.. to see her in this state.. she totally ignore me. she somtimes do things hurt my feelings she wun noe.. can;t blame her also.. cos she's stressed out.. she wud not even let me visit her grandma.. i was like disappointed.. my care n concern.. she totally shrugged off like that.. kinda.. i'm having a fvever and yet i did these things for her.. i reali hope she will b her normal self.. *no 1 noes me like him* this phrase.. it attached to my heart like a nail thru a plank of wood.. its bleeding internally now.. i was like.. MY CAMP destroy my life... i'm no longer my usual self.. all thats left behind is just a fucking shell.. i got no soul i got no heart.. i'm lost.. my lights have dimmed.. i got no more mood to carry on this post.. hope tml she will be fine.. P.S dear.. i wish yur grandma recover soon.. i realli do.. i love u alot and dun wana see u in this state.. k?

2006-07-18T06:03:00.000-07:00

Currently I in camp, and I miss my dear dear a lot. How I wish I can go home and find her to give her a big hug for a minute. Feeling so stress nowaday, I am sorry to make my dear dear worry for me. And I love her very much. I wish I could hold her right now and hug her tightly wishing the time would stop. Ok... End le... The shortest post ever.

*written by dear dear(haiz.........)*

2006-07-16T17:00:00.000-07:00

my gift to her today sick le neh.. but i must continue to write this thingy.. cos i say i will do it de.. that toot toot de dear.. in my house.. we ben lai wana do the jig saw de.. in the end.. only she do.. cos i bed ridden.. i'm sry dear. love you.. hha.. silly de her.. dream of me as a fu xing ren... peng.. i'm not lo.. baka~!!.. heh.. this gal ah.. i luv her very much.. i also duno y.. but my heart just wans to be wif her.. nv see her 1 day i also will die those feeling lo.. lol.. die my singlish becomin more jia lat.. gana influence by her..lol..k la.. she ask me go sleep le.. T.T jana.. will update soon..

a scary n fun day wif her

2006-07-07T23:55:00.000-07:00

i'll cut it short since i'm super tired n abit giddy.. today i went to np to fetch her.. cos i heard frm her she abit unwell.. giddy.. so i after camp i sright rush to np.. when i reached le.. she say i late.. *humph*.... wad only..now tat piggie.. dao me cos i say i marry her.. peng seh.. she ah.. i duno le la.. wad i say she also dun like.. i duno wad to do le.. i wana die le.. sighz so stressed!!! how to make her see i realli nv bluff her.. tat i;m so f*ckin stressed?? over my army job as a clerk.. !@#! ppl office got alot of clerk to do diff job.. while for me.. i solo clerk.. bsbh (bao shan bao hai) i canot even sit for 30 sec.. let alone eat my meals regularly.. sigh.. canot even sleep tat well.. cos i scare fone ring is them call.. but when ever i see is deard ear call de.. i very happi.. cos she can make me feel alot better.. forget abt my wrk.. wee.. luv u dear.. today i enjoy the movie.. thanks wor.. muackz..

2006-07-05T23:49:00.000-07:00

lalala happi wor this few days with sum1 special.. yest was wif her by the water.. just the two of us.. we listen to the water.. closed our eyes n feel the wind.. tilt our head n see the sky.. it was breath taking.. totally.. cos i had to book in by 2330.. i left at abt 2100+ as we abt to walk to the light.. she suddenly said give me a big hug.. she gently tug me. towards her den hold me tight.. i was stone for a moment.. as she was always the shy party.. but i'm glad sumhow.. i hugged her tightly den we walked back to the mrt hand in hand. Today.. was nice.. we were at the same place..same time.. same ppl (just us!!) but the atmosphere was abit dull.. i duno why either.. mayb she was sleepy.. *baka*.... as she lie on my shoulder.. i held her close den out of no where the wind picked up.. n it was the same feelin.. i finally got her dwn on the grass wif me.. (dun anyhow link... ppl please......) we lay side by side with her sleeping in my arms.. cos i told her i'll wake her up..as i observed her sleepin.. i was thinking.. either i'm a good 'bed' or she realli is tired.. she was sound asleep.. so cute when she sleep.. my back and leg cramped but i dun dare to move incase i'll wake her.. as i woke her up 30 mins ltr.. she asked for sumore mins.. which i obliged.. but then.. RING RING.. mum callled.. idiot man.. she sat up and cuddle her legs.. while i chatted on the phone wif my mum.. (gee thanks alot mum~! *roll eyes*) i hang up like 1 min ltr.. and i sat up next to her to cuddle her close .. cos i realise she was cold.. *she wore her jacket* i gave her a quick smooch on her cheek and asked her to sleep for just a little while.. in appreciation she gave me a smooch on my lips.. heh next she claim i stole her kiss.. =.=" fine fine dear.. wadever.. i stole yur kiss. which u gave willingly.. lol :P both sides win.. ^^ i gtg sleep soon.. cos tml i got alot to do.. yea.. night and take care.. love you dear.. love yur little suprise.. ^^ i'll keep it well.. wun let it touch water.. i promise.. jana~

2006-07-01T23:58:00.000-07:00

LOVE LOVE hey its been awhile, heck! i missed the timing.. but i wrote this on 12 am.. 1st of all.. to jismyl happi bday girl.. hmm.. next is its been so long since i wrote in this blog of mine.. dusty it has become.. the reason i wrote it is due to.. 1 person.. that tats is my dear.. baka.. hui ling.. hha she say must write ssince today actually is yest special day.. lol.. fine fine.. i'm here to write.. well frankly.. she is the 1st person whom i can tok abt anything.. we r similar in ways u canot imagine.. n we share tots n stuff.. so i find her to b a nice n sweet gal.. she also kinda shy in relationships.. unlike me who has gone up n dwn in that road.. she is actually new to it.. and she is afraid to get hurt.. but i'm not that kind of guy.. hmm.. ltr on me n her will go see movie.. n shop ard.. must treasure all the time.. the mins.. i'll make sure she's the most xing fu gal.. yeah.. cos i'll always b there for u .. i promise..
Shawn

2006-05-27T21:07:00.000-07:00

Its been a while has'nt it? Hey all.. guess wad.. i just woke nt long ago.. heh i mean like hrs ago.. i yest had to undergo a heart operation.. cos my ribs, one part of it anyways had broke.. and it is pinning against my heart threatening of piercing it thru... so doct had to operate me.. chances of sucess is low.. and my survival rate is kinda slim too... i at 1st dun dare to go thru wif it.. but there's a special girl in my life.. that has been supporting me and pursuading me to go operate.. i rem her wrds deeply.. "If u go op, u may still live.. but if u nv u dun even have the chance to survive till old" she said (or sumthing similar).. so i heed her wrds and go for it.. FRI MAY 26, is the day of the op.. i'm having the op at night.. i'm kinda afriad i'm nv gonna see the day again.. so in my last attempt i wana try to see jismyl's face 1 last time.. but due to sum problems.. she can't come over my hse.. *sigh*.. nvm.. no biggie.. i just told her.. take it as a vow that i will b back to see u.. :) .. when i reached the hospital with a heavy heart..i felt kinda down u noe.. when i was wheeled into the operating area.. i smiled weakly at the nurses beside me.. they r all students though.. i flash them a thumbs up..indicating i'm cool wif it..when the doct hover the mask over me asking me to breathe in deep..my life flashes b4 me.. all the things every1 said to me all floated in my mind suddenly.. total darkness i could not see or hear anything anymore.. i was like in a dark world.. only could hear my heart beating slowly.. but surely.. i duno wad happened.. but the dark empty world broke up and i found myself in a field full of aromatic flowers.. it was peaceful and sumwhat divine. a figure walked towards me i looked up and i saw.. my grandma?! she was beckonin me to come over to her i was puzzled.. i asked her y r u here? but i tot.. i paused..(how r u suppose to tell sum1 u r dead?!?) i was totally confused.. summore her grave was back in ido, jp how could she hab been here.. sensing sumthing amiss.. i start to walk backwards without turning ard.. sensing sumore "beings" i took a quick glace behind me.. wth?! My family and friends all at the other side of the field.. waving and beckoning me over.. wads wrong wif me?!!? just then i heard a voice.. "hmmph"!.. i canot quite catch it but i looked over and saw.. its jismyl..she was mouthing sumthing.. i canot catch the wrds.. but sounds like wad shown..when the wind died.. i hear the wrds clearly.. it was SHAWN WAKE UP... i open my eyes i jerked up frm my bed my head collided with the nurse's.. i now damn confused.. wad's happening.. the nursed dazzed.. rubbed her forehead.. in agony den l00ked at me.. says "glad to have u back here.. but could u mind not to starle me next time.?" i smiled weakly and say.. "sorry".. it was embarassing.. she's still an trainee as i can see her name tag .she was abt 22 yrs of age and i do admit she's kinda hot.. but hey mayb is the medcine running thru my brain for all i noe..(laughs) she explained that i had been in coma for almost 24 hrs now.. and luckily she managed to woke me up by calling my name and gently shaking my shoulders... she explain it was desprate measure cos if by the next min i dun wake.. i wud b in critial condition.. she helped me removed my oxygen mask i tink.. den the wires connected to me and to the machine that was measuring my heart rate.. i realise that my cheeks were moist.. and i rubbed my eyes.. huh?! tears? y was i crying?? tats weird.. after a couple of hours.. though the doct checked my condition and say i shud stay for further observation.. i insisted that i was to b discharged.. so in the end.. here i am.. at home writing this blog.. basically i got many un done matters to attend to..like continue my small video editing fame.. very minute.. very little.. fame i might add.. heh.. plus i did have a promise to keep.. i did say.. i will come back to her .. in fact in my heart i was sayin... i wud not leave yur side and let other guys b yur guardian nagel.. hha.. i guess tats wad my heart wanted to say.. kinda selfish dun ya tink? at least i was driven by this goal.. yeah.. my heart is starting to kill me.. i guess i better turn in.. night folks..

a choice which i can't partake

2006-05-12T02:40:00.000-07:00

my friend just asked me to wipe her memories frm my mind.. delete her hp no. (which i memorised by heart) her msn completely forget there is this perosn and move on.. i tot abt it deeply.. and i noe.. i can;t do tat.. finally we r gettin close as frens even... i dun mind.. just as long as i can see her or hear her voice i am glad.. i mean.. like he said i chose to be her guardian angel in da dark.. even if she asked me now to help her to strengthen her realtionship wif her bf.. i guess i dun hab much of a choice.. i nv said a no to her b4.. guess i'm such a weak ass.. *total demoralisation!!*

2006-05-12T02:12:00.000-07:00

Was it all worth it? I have been having the most terrible month ever.. while celebrating my fren's bday.. i initally dun wish to go.. but after she pursaded me countless times.. i decided hell wif it.. and i went.. her bf was there.. i finally met her bf.. actually i knew him.. nt as in buddy buddy but i seen him in sch b4.. in fact i taught him in cca b4 i tink.. my heart was terribly heavy tat day.. she asked me y i looked so tired.. i mangaed to fake a smile say i'm just beat. they were lookin fine and cozy as bf&gf shud.. but it oni make me feel more terrible.. sumhow i managed to switched channels and luff along to idiotic things.. play along sum kiddy stuff which i used to detest. he held her hands and hold her close.. i duno which is more inviting.. being there or just jump frm the 12 storey dwn. sumtimes i noe she is da most blur and slow to catch on type of gal.. but.. argh lets not get there..for her i sacrificed alot of stuff.. my time.. (i lied when i say i very free) my money (secretly bought stuff for her claiming i hab no use for the items).. helpin her in everyway i can.. i tink mayb tat makes me feel kinda impt u noe.. all my life i was alone.. everytime sch's over i wud not wana return home.. cos no1's there all my frens leaved me.. each had their own path to take.. me? i'm just a lost lamb X_X recently.. she has nt been picking up my calls or returnin my smses.. i start to wonder did she forget her promise as nt to neglect me or gibe me a cold shoulder.. did i outlive my usefulness?? i am god damn confused right now.. i dun even have the mood to play any games.. just lie on my bed and stare at the sky..(mayb a bit too much.. after all i am typing this in frnt of my com) but thats wad i'm gonna do ltr. its like she noes or duno how i feel everytime.. once she asked me y do u help me so much? how was i suppose to ans? tat i luv u? tat i care? how can i ans that knowing full well wad she will do.. in da past she wud avoid me and treat me like an alien.. tok abt shame.. sigh.. am i realli dat bad? y she gave all others a chance cept me? dun i deserve an equal chance? haven i done enuff? wad more must i undertake to be able to hold her?? god pls.. pls gibe me a sign.. save me frm my own destruction.if i meet god 1 day i will ask him this qns.. there are more den a million women out there.. and more den 25% are beautiful and with good figures.. y did i choose to luv a girl such as her? frankly speaking she's nt the most beautiful.. nor is she the most *bodyful* sry for the wrd :P (made up by me) but the feeling i have from her is the strongest i ever had for any female. after all i liked and luv her ever since i 1st met her in secondary 2 i was 2 yrs her senior den.. tat time i 1st saw her was at a sports meet.. i noticed her cos of her cute hair.. bunched up like chun li.. heh.. slowly i get to noe her name.. tat time she was my fren's "god sis" and he kinda like her.. so he asked me wad to do in mirc.. i told him the method.. yet imagine the shock when she came find me in mirc to chat.. slowly i get to noe her better bit by bit..i still saved the email msges tat we conversed last time.. and imagine the pain when she say she clean forgotten everything tat has happened.. though i told her no worries.. but how unknowing a girl can get? i meet her face to face wif my other fren and we went to farmmart cos i use to wrk there.. show her the puppies and dogs.. *sigh* now our 1st actual "date" was at causeway point i rem she tied a ponytail. and she wore a white blouse as for bottom i fergotten.. i only i keep lookin into her eyes.. and always find myself lost in them.. lots of guys at causeway pt keep lookin at her as well.. blah.. when she broke up wif an arsehole tat quite clearly i haven forgiven till now.. i was there to console her brought her out to cheer her up.. which she clearly forgotten also.. only this yr did we get close enuff to be "close frens" now i noe wad i actually mean to her and it was so minute.. i was oni a fragment of memory in her mind till now.. tat is soo soo sad..i did try to moved on.. but its just tat.. my mind keeps thinking of her.. even in my slp i whisper her name i swear.. my mum can vouched for that :X my mum asked me not to b 3rd party, i told her nt to worry, nt like i could anyways.. lookin at the current situation tat is..right now my heart is saying.. if there is to be sum1 hurt.. might as well b me.. i can't let her cry or sad again.. i can only suffer silently and welcome her wif a usual cranky smile and a hearty luff in msn or outside ^^ pray i can get use to it.. *sighz* thx to any1 whu is readin this.. i feel much better after letting few yrs of grudges out *domo* ^^ btw happy vesak day~ :P

Shawn

2006-04-19T19:30:00.000-07:00

I fig out i haven told any1 abt yest.. well since i am free might as well do it while i got time... well nth much happened i met wif jis to return the vcd together and we ate dinner or supper? hmm not sure.. but i treated her porraidge sry wish could do more.. in return she treat me drinks.. lol.. after that we stroll ard went to mac to sit and tok.. i realised its been so long.. too long since i realli looked into her eyes like that.. btw i can tell wads the person is thinkin or sumthin like that while gazing into their eyes.. the queerest thing is.. i can't seem to do that to her.. and that fancinated me since sec sch i believe.. anyways we played wif coins =.=" can u believe 1 adult(me) and a teenager(her) in a fastfood resturant(mac) play coins??? i could'nt also.. but heh duno y i started playing.. spinning all de coins at the same time..but the funtime was dashed by a grp of kns teenagers.. tok loudly in the mac tch.. tats y i dispised singapore teen gangsters.. bunch of childish ill-mannered peeps.. zzz tink i trace back when i was waiting below her blk..( toking abt her always put a smile on my face) i met ivy below jis's blk.. ivy was wif calvin.. haha idiot ivy keep hinting me her bday =.= thanx ah.. now i wana forget also canot.. zz anyways jis came dwn shortly after ivy went up.. 1st thing jis did was ask me how her hair looked.. =.= haha she looked cute.. excatly the way i envisioned her to be.. after all i told her to get that hair cut de hha :P i did say it wud looked good on her.. haha now she looked like the character frm kh2 ^^ kawaii~ haha i keep smiling whenever i am ard her.. haha she's like my happy fruit.. kai xing guo.. her every actions makes me smiled. anyways just got another comment abt my video.. it was quite alrite.. ALRITE!! tats not the wrd i was lookin for.. every1 tot its all de same frm the orginal.. but no.. i edited alot k.. mayb too perfect u all din noticed.. MUST B IT!! kk back to jis.. after mac.. i walked her home.. how i wish every night could b this way.. but.. narh *sigh* sarang heyo..

2006-04-19T19:16:00.000-07:00

I wish i could relax like that too
Today i was damn pissed... i lost my drive.. which i kept all my art wrks and stuff.. argh.. woke up abit late.. made jis abit angry cos she called me but when i picked up she din ans.. so i tot wads up i called her agin.. din noe she was in class =.=" frm the tone i noe she's pissed.. *sigh* i last night made lots of videos.. best i made was the combination of kh2 opening and the song dui ni shuo by jj.. but sum bastard asshole says its simple stuff to make such things.. just copy and paste.. hell as if i duno.. but the hard part is the voice and movement timing.. furthermore i cut the pieces up i mixed them and i added in sum visual effects.. it may seem easy or sopund easy.. but hell no1 taught me anything.. i learn all this by MYSELF. I DESERVED TAT CREDIT DUN I?!@#$#@! Ignorant fool.. ZZ i went to find jis via de hp to su ku.. but she wif bf.. sigh =.=" i noe i promised my closest departed fren tat i wun shed any tears so easily.. but.. i almost shed a tear i duno y.. mayb i tin i am stressed to the brim of exhaustion..now feelin a tinnie weenie better.. no 1 to rely on.. just myself.. k signed off.. sarang heyo~

This is wad i did .. realli so simple? *sigh*

Shawn

2006-04-13T01:20:00.000-07:00

Heh nice nice? wish is i draw.. haha losing my skills sux..XP
heh.. i noe suppose to b boa de site... but i put hikaru chan's song.. anyways.. in case ppl out there interested.. this is kingdom hearts opening and ending theme.. .."passion" sung by utada hikaru :) tons of things had happen.. and my time is getting thinner.. (:P not that i kan bu kai hor jis) my health has nv been so well.. though i seem fit.. but i am quite a sickly child since birth.. i think of late i suffered sumthing similar to tb.. :X *choi choi* but.. i had been either coughin like mad or puking out blood or.. wad seems like blood to me.. my chest pains gettin worser each day.. not sure wad happen too.. doct can;t help too.. says needa hospitalise to experiment =.=" i hate doctors.. so pls.. i wud eat a whole crate of apples to keep them away.. i hate syringe too!! bad memories in nuh sorry hha :X or rather pri sch the jab for bcg the needle broke stuck in my arm.. =.=" scary.. today worse help fren deliver things.. i rode my bike out in da late noon.. suddenly my vision turn blur.. and den u guessed it.. i buang.. i lucky just missed a lorry but my leg got sandwiched betwwen my bike and the pavement curb.. luckily got ppl help.. my calf area not lookin too good.. bit wee swollen.. barely able to walk straight.. so tat can keep it frm my parents.. initially the kind folks wana send me to hospital and call for police 1.. but i say no and rode off.. hhha can;t get in trouble in this.. my parents will kill me.. plus alot of diff things to explain.. i suppose to b at home mc 1 u see :P anyway now that i self remedy my leg it looks like a ........ dumpling ? =.=" (hungry la pai seh:P) i quickly got home and straight went to bathe.. in fact i was washing my pants inside.. can't let my parents see the blood soaked pants.. if they ask abt the remainin stain i just say road kill or sumthin haha :P (road kill= dead rat or cat or bird on the road) k time to go slp.. if not jis sure niam me 1 =.=" but b4 i slp i go find her lyrics help her (*OFFERED by me* haha) Jot sum dwn or wad thing.. dizzy abit so after that i will sleep like a pig liao.. jana~

Shawn

2006-04-11T12:25:00.000-07:00

*heh*heh*nth much to say.. just felt kinda weird.. helpin sum1 i luv to maintian her relationship wif her dar dar .On my own accord and free will ..tats wad makes it weird..

2006-03-30T19:00:00.000-08:00

Wah she realli is god damn beautiful..
hmm.. where shud i start? its been a while...right now yw is tempting me to the dark side.. hha and i am starting to tink i shud give in? hha..anyways.. i went shoppin wif jis that day.. ard mon.. yup though quite short.. but its the 1st for me to go shoppin for food ingredients wif a gal in the noon sumore.. kaoz.. hardly any fresh prawn or fishes left man..i still rem her silly wrds.. i'm gonna cook a thai cum Chinese style pineapple rice..=.= i snicker in my heart.. she haben learn to walk wana learn how to fly le.. tat gal.. haha.. its typical for beginners la.. they always aim high.. just like when i 1st started to cook ard age of 10 i try to cook a shredded chicken cheese pasta.. in end up in the toilet almost being a P.R there hhahhaha.. i learned my lesson.. and start from the most traditonal and beginning way.. make a sunny side up.. after 2 to 3 days.. i finally make a pathetic sunny side up wif a full round translucent egg yolk.. ^^ b4 that all the yolk either ooze out on me.. or too hard.. next lesson 2.. how to cook fried rice.. of course witout eggs..1st. by the time i was 12 i was able to cover most of the rice wif egg.. making it into a yellow fried rice.. ^^ not many ppl.. noe i knew how to cook.. they tot i am those type of guys whu oni wait for gals to cook.. i rem when my mum asked me last time y i wana learn to cook.. i cheekyly told her.. cos wait for u women to learn to cook.. i wud hab starved? hhahha..which was quite true... i mean now adays women tend to be too bz fighting over the wrking society wif men.. rather than learn the basics of cookin.. (now dun u women say it is'nt so). anyways.. hha besides all the cookin days passing... i had been bz studying for my exam.. yup.. nope u din see wrongly..
i had been STUDYIN.. hha ppl used to say i wud only study if pigs wud fly.. i found it true,, pigs do fly~.. how? u add a eon.. to make it into a pigeon~ :P i noe.. lame.. hhahha k signin off.. hha i wana go play ps2 liao~ :P cya~ jana~

Shawn

2006-03-22T00:32:00.000-08:00

WaItInG FoR U~!!

eh today went to steamboat.. gana dragged in actually.. anyways.. ben lai yue jis de.. but she says she not feelin well went toilet 3 times.. so i fig.. eh nvm.. haha.. duno wad da hell she ate also.. silly gal..anyways she msg me says feelin better and thus i (playing doct) says to cut dwn on the dairy and oil intake..as they can cause another tummy upset.. after that my frens and me reached marina there.. we start the cookin.. my frens compain say i cook oni for myself.. haha sorry la guys.. my cookin just not for guys to eat.. *blah~!* next they went to cine there play lan game.. sry again guys.. ppl noe me well shud noe i dun frequently play lan game.. its a waste of benjamins..($$) i oni can gave pointers.. haha but i dun like playin.. next i took mrt home wif two of my sec sch juniors.. we crap in train..and joked abt.. nxt is as i walk back home.. i saw a gal frm afar.. on closer look omg.. its weizhen.. -.- she must hab forgotten abt moi.. but nvm we r not tat close anyways.. haha good to see she's doin well and all though and.. did i state i was drinkin? well not much just a tinny winy bit.. mayb not.. haha :P but at least i am sober.. after chowing dwn on all the food i could realli use a ice cold beer.. yeah.. *burpz* time to go.. ciaoz..

2006-03-19T22:29:00.000-08:00

sweet~!!

heh today got sumthings happenin.. today my hse got alot of guest? hha.. b4 that lets tok abt the day b4.. hmm on sat i suppose to slp early then meet up wif louis on sun in da wee mornin.. like 7 am.. at bb mrt.. so i was suppose to wake up like ard 5+ to 6 and bathe and dressed.. but i on sat nite i chiong study.. for my paper at 30 march.. after i finish my revision.. i look at the time OMFG..!! its 5 am le.. i dun dare to rest abit.. cos i scare i late.. i ten dto have a tendacy to be late wif guys other wise punctual.. *wink* So.... i bathed and drink sum coffee.. and i do mean BIG mugs of it.. i went to my destination only to realise.. sat morning archery is optional!! and can go at anytime.. i could hab been there like 10am.. but nooo..! mr louis say reach there at 8am!! ZZZ my beauty slp!! after few hrs of sun bathin.. (cos of my injured shoulder, i can't draw a bow properly) i sat there reading my books and revision paper.. we went of for lunch and follow by shoppin in bugis.. and ltr meeting wif leng to see v for verdetta.. its a very good movie.. makes me feel abit communist! :x hail V!!! wahha.. anyways i got home ard 10pm.. then i continue to chat online and revision abit.. suddenly black out.. i wake up oni when my mum enter my room.. and say y i nv off the com and slp.. i look at my clock... OMG!! its 5 am.. i practically fell aslp in frnt of my com.. hhha.. i off my com and went back to slp.. i woke ard 12+ close to 1 pm today.. and.. it was good! the feelin.. i stretch in my bed.. (p.s i always stretch my body in bed) and i go brush teeth (u get the pic..) and eat and do my normal morning "ritual" ltr on i queried jismyl abt my rest of notes.. she sms back and say meet her at her hse dwnstairs (usual spot) at 3.55pm.. i look at the time.. omg its 3+ already... grrz.. i do hate last min stuff.. anyway she gave me a choice though.. meet at 6 or 3.55 i chose 3.55 y? cos i got family thingy at evenin.. and trust me u wun wana see the faces of my parents if i leave hse at 6.. =.=" so i rushed out of my hse wif my trusty umbrella.. cos its abt to rain.. i smirk cos i pray it rained.. 1 it is hot..2.. it is.. cos jis ltr goin out.. and i kinda envy? :P so i pray rain.. so she stays at home and pei me chat online :P heh heh i noe i noe.. its selfish.. :X but hey.! whu isn't >=D but sadly it did rain while i was on my way to her hse.. i waited for her dwn stairs for abt 10 mins.. but WAH LAU.. the rain stop.. even the stupid sky dun help me.. grrz.. so me and her parted ways after she gave me the notes.. i slwoly walk back home wif a black cloud hovering my head ( a metaphore) and now... i am still watching the videos she pasted on my msn.. haha i can choose not to see them.. but hey.. she's the only gal alive to make me sit for almost an hour like a idiot waiting for her.. humph.. (i'm tokin abt the time she forgot check her fone.. idiot gal :X) anyway's i finally see finish e vids.. alrite la.. not as bad as i tot they'll b.. cos seriously... OU XIANG JU is realli not my type..i can't stand ppl crying.. so those sobing tearing shows.. if i can i will avoid them.. other wise i will cry wif them? tears of agony!! wahha :x -out-

Wish it was drawn by me though :P

Kawaii neh~!

2006-03-15T21:00:00.000-08:00

Sexy eh? the classic wind in your hair look..

heh.. today by right suppose to go out wif jismyl de go rent her ou xiang ju..vcd.. but early 10+ or 11 she msg me say no mood.. sry dun wana go.. =.= i fig out gal ah.. not u no mood.. is u LAZY lah.. nvm i shall motivate u come out more.. ZZZ i last nite had a weird dream.. weirdest i came across.. i was duno who.. i was smokin a stick of marblo and i had a hand gun.. tink abt to go drug burst or sumthing.. then suddenly flash there was this guy.. in a lab coat.. wif specs luffing like a manic.. shot me at the head and abdomen area like tons of times.. i swear i can feel the pain.. it was gut wrenchin my fingers sudden feel numb... i glance dwn and saw omg there were syringes stuck to each fingers.. and my eyes got needles stuck into them.. tink i blcked out oni to the echo of the manic luffin.. i was englufed in darkness.. just i was abt to give up hope.. i heard a tone.. familiar ring tone.. it was my phone i received a msg.. i roll over picked by my phone flip it up.. then saw jis msg.. then i realised.. hey i'm awake!! wad a weird dream huh? heh.. mayb i shud cut dwn on coffee *snicker*

BoA BoA.. B.O.A wahha SI WA EH!!:P(lame? i noe)

2006-03-14T23:08:00.000-08:00

my wifey~
Well.. its been sumtimes since my last blog.. i decided to get over the past i mean.. life goes on rite? lots have happened.. hmm.. me and her r getting close due to frenship.. yup.. and well i am 20!! finally.. haha yup my birthday just passed not long ago.. 5th of march.. well if any of u ppl saw this.. belated prezzy are still welcomed.. heh.. much obliged.. :P

I luV BOA

2006-03-01T19:07:00.000-08:00

Haiz same old me.. I noe it's not yet a day.. but.. i feel like writing 2 post today.. cos as i was ransacking my desk.. i found the cdss yr bk.. as i flip thru.. memories of my sec life flows thru my mind.. then i stoped at 2a.. i admire jis pic for awhile.. haha i noe i noe.. been so long.. mayb ivy's rite.. i shud gave up anyways now tat jis got attached.. As i flipped to the last autographed page.. i read all the farewells and wishes from my friends and juniors.. i slowly read one by one.. luff at some of them and smile at sum of them.. i glanced at a particular msg there.. eh boi.. hai hao ma? wish u all the best.. take care wor~ maoz.. haha i immediate know whu is it.. hai.. *slap* i shud'nt tink too much over it.. i mean after all this close 20 yrs of my life.. wad hab i done? if god gave me a chance.. i wud just tell jis how i realli feel now.. regardless of if she is attached or not.. at least i wud feel alot better.. yeah.. tink is time i move out of shawn's ville and move on to the world.. YEAH
~('.' ~)~( -_- )~(~ '.')~

2006-03-01T15:27:00.000-08:00

Combination of my fav games heh heh..
Sorry nv update any this few days.. cos nth realli happen.. cos i had been confined at home all day... so bored... mayb a few more days i will change the face of my blog.. heh heh.. today is wed eh.. tat means.. 4 more days!! to wad u ask? to my BIG DAY!! haha.. i am gonna b 20 soon.. no more teen.. canot be so kiddy anymore.. not tat i wanna anyways.. heh..but no matter wad.. i tink theres a child in every one of us.. regardless of age.. *quoted from nokia* haha so.. i tink i better prepare for party this sun.. wahaha.. man.. am i gonna feast! ( ^0^ )V

2006-02-20T17:35:00.000-08:00

Aww.. when can i get tied dwn too? haha siao liao me..
Well.. guess whu's back? haha i been terribly busy to update for such a long time.. almost a year? well.. my last entry was 2005 haha so counted ba.. wahah Lots of things happening.. from heart borken to serving ns to my arm gettin operation and thus landing me in this current situation.. (~^0^)~ I am at home resting for 3 mths!! No need NS!! wahaha ~(^0^~) ahem.. any ways... i'm back.. and thats it.. i browse thru sum blogs.. and found out.. hey sharon.. is the same as me.. we are lacto vege.. haha i read her post abt the cow and the milk thing.. i luff out lud thinkin.. it suits my current situation.. haha so troublesome everyday ppl asked me the same qns.. haha u vege.. can eat egg meh? hahah and i got to explain eggs are not alive unless they r fertilized.. whu da hell eat a fertilized egg anyways.. grrz.. heh.. anyways.. the pain killer effects must be kickin in.. cos i'm gettin drowsy.. brrz.. better go rest abit.. well peeps.. take care and cya in a few mths time.. in person.. i mean.. wahaha...*Snoreez*

2005-11-03T01:40:00.000-08:00

Nice Right?

It's been so long since i last blog.. i tot my blog will rust man... well.. i left almost 4 weeks to my p.o.p and i am lookin forward to it.. heh.. been thru hell and stuff.. ns actually is kinda fun if u looked in my point of view.. yes.. i had been pumped and punished like no tml.. but its fun.. cos u do it wif yur platoon.. suffer like sh*t then all gathered in a room.. complained to each other abt the sgts and stuff.. speaking more abt my ns life.. my platoon is known as platoon 4.. it consisted of alot of unique and unusal characters and casts.. it holds a guy who speaks fluent english.. i mean realli fluent.. as in those in those bcc english programme.. cos u see.. he studied in england for 2 yrs thus the accent.. my platoon also holds a guy whu studies the way of life.. to be more excat.. the kamasutra way of life.. hell he knows more way to shoot the plane(adult rated stuff) than most guys.. like i am still wondering how do u do it back handed.. hmm.. gives me the shivers just thinking abt it.. lets moved on.. oh yes my platoon got a few hokkien soldiers thus makin my platoon famous.. haha we sang hokkien army songs..then bunch of jokers.. lets not forget about the killer.. (not cos he is fierce but he is forced by the commanders to shout "KILL!!" and give a fierce look.. which resulted in the whole platoon laughin in the end.. he's kinda slow in doin stuffs which kinda pissed me off sumthimes.. and there's also the one the only.. head bobber aka xiao yan zi haha.. he march in a interesting way.. whereby his head bobs up and dwn and side to side everytime he marches.. thus resulting in the platoon not daring to stand anywhere near him.. cos we will die of laughin plus his head is kinda big .. thus earning him the nickname pinky and the brain in start of ptp.. heh heh..he rarely smiles.. always shows a gloomy face but when he does.. the whole platoon will laugh to the extend even if we do push ups we will do it wif laughter.. k i tink thats abt it.. oh i almost forgot.. the most impt character in my platoon.. small A !!.. cos not of his name starting wif A.. but is cos his physical build.. normal guys chest is squarish i tink.. but his is of a *toot* shape.. looks like a female *toot* and is of a A cup size.. henceforth we dubbed him.. Xiao A (loosely translated to small A).. k i better go slp.. damn tired.. till next time..

2005-09-25T10:50:00.000-07:00

Heh been a while now i'm back including more pics of babes and stuff :P
haha.. i'm back~ oni for a day though.. after two weeks of hellish training i finally get to book out for a day to spend time wif frens and family.. wads there in the camp? hmm.. well i meet alot of ppl.. funny bunch and joker bunch.. got a few lazy asses who everytime sabotages the whole company and sum wif attuide problems..got strength training and speed training.. and alot more.. fun and tiring.. if look at the bright side i am getting abit fitter everyday.. haha.. ya when i reach home i went out to see movie wif youwen and louis..plus sebas louis bro.. we went to see myth a show wif jackie chan in it.. got babes and hunks.. great fighting action flick plus a pinch of comedy in it.. in less then 24 hrs i will be bookin in again.. they say boys become man when they go into ns is true, i go inside i tot alot abt my life.. and i start to miss my family and frens.. start to treasure the time all of us spend together.. i wish time go fast.. i want to stay at home..

2005-09-09T00:30:00.000-07:00

Cute right? heh.. moon geun young, actress of innocent steps..
less then 6 hrs till i have to report to jurong camp.. haha.. sounds familir doesn't it.. if u seen leng's blog.. his previous entires also got this quote of similar thing.. ya.. i too feel abit nervous and can't slp.. i tot i was ready for this.. cos i had sum "military training" b4.. but HELL was i wrong.. i begain to doubt my abilites and i am damn scared as the time ticked nearer.. i am scared cos i forgotten everything they taught in the corp.. i mean i realli had to drill my skull to rem how to strip a rifle.. argh.. hack.. gotto slp.. if not i canot be in tip top condition ltr on... gotta stand out of the crowd...!!

2005-08-29T01:45:00.000-07:00

Wah look abit like ai sha -.- peng!!
Haha k now i will tok abt my other frens.. cos of sum "complain" :P 1st of all i go college west clementi i met louis and Jing Sheng Aka Leng Funny thing is we met all on bball court.. i always meet frens on the bball court haha shiok.. leng leh.. he wun rem de la.. 1st time is actually he tok to me.. haha at 1st tot he just a normal player on the court.. but suddenly he show his true color.. (and it is not purple :X) he chiong dwn the court majam super man.. i barely keep up wif him.. after that i go home take the mrt train.. a person behind me tok to me.. i turn ard it was leng he apparently took the opp train.. yup we met that day been frens till now.. and i hope forever.. now to another fren.. louis.. haha i met louis also in the court.. but at a ltr date.. tink is next day or sumthing.. for got how though.. tink just start tyo tok crap ard.. haha we share bball tips.. and kof manics haha challange the game play in class nv listen in class alot.. not oni me.. leng also haha we played like siao .. share comics.. in class tok abt gals.. comics games.. life.. bball.. sweaty bunch and noisy bunch.. slp in class but not me.. i rarely slp in class. weird.. la.. i canot slp wif sum1 looking at me.. mayb i am those "light slper" but see if i super duper tired.. i will be a log.. u kick and pinch i also wun budge..(tested and proven by ancw) haha now all my frens are included here hope everybody is happi.. haha :X time to slp le.. ciao.. *poof*

2005-08-27T09:40:00.000-07:00

Haiz beauty and da beast?! XD kiddin
Sorry people for not updating.. cos i been sick for lets see close to almost a week? coughing non stop and a fever of 38.9 degrees "bed ridden" for days now.. i keep having major flashback of the past wif frens.. in sec sch .. pri sch.. mostly is like my entire 20 yrs of life replaying over again.. i "seen" hell's gate and i made it back alive.. heh jokes asides.. but ever since those "flashbacks" i been made clearer as to whom my buddies were.. always with me thru thick and thin.. like one of them zhiwei.. haha sumtimes cocky(for fun) but he and me were not always frens in the past.. we met each other at sec 2 .. we met on the basketball court .. guess we starting the ball rollin there (sorry for pun) next next we became frens then join same cca.. bball i tink.. but soon closes cos of renovation.. but nontheless buddies.. next thing we became enemys or rather rivals cos of sum opinon disputes.. but cool.. settle it like man.. (though i threaten him wif it nowadays :P) then i join in the karate wif him.. he was green belter that time and i was oni white.. haha but he chao geng de.. haha after graduation or was it b4 that i fergot(sorry memory seems to fail me nowadays) we join hong kah north cc bball team.. we nv make it to the main team cos we quit :x forgotten why also.. then we got seperated in our ways cos of studies and stuff but still got keep in touch.. zhiwei i can say.. he is one of those frens i made using my fist.. haha :X ya buddies for life (by this i hope u r seeing this wei.. and i wish the 10 bucks u fergot hor :P wahahaha!) *gone*

2005-08-19T15:37:00.000-07:00

[J.C]
Yeah
You can't help but feel it
Can't help but feel this one
Uh-huh uh yeah

Excuse me for a minute while I lighten the mood
Just clap with me like the lightning do, yeah
A bit of soul food that you be bitin into
And if you feel me then I'm writin for you, uh-huh
Right now put another coat of wax on the ride
For a minute put the beef and the gats to the side
Cause this track's got a vibe to chill to
Enjoy life for 5 minutes, man it's not gon' kill you
It's okay to be hard and stay true man
But at the end of the day, we all hu-man
This one's for you, the ones that you close to
Show some love, it's what you supposed to
Right now, forget the ends and the Benz
Pop a cold one, man toast it wit'cha real friends
Call your folks, tell 'em you tight now
Cause everything lookin pretty good right now

[Chorus]
[Trademarc]
Right now baby, we all gon' ride
So place those things on your hips or side
The soul vibe gon' change, give way with fame
But sometimes the moral change or stay the same
Relax baby, right now you here
And sit back baby, with a round of beer
And cheer to those friends who crowded near
For those passed on in spirit they there
It's gon' be what it must, break bread wit'cha crew
If you got kids take the crust
It's all love baby, tell your girl she's strong
And whisper in her ear after dinner it's on
And take it slow baby, cause everything real
When you at family dinner y'all enjoy that meal
Thank God that you healthy and you keepin it tight
And keep your dreams lighthearted when you sleepin at night

[Chorus]
[J.C]
Yeah - and right now I'm showin love to my brothers and my old man
To my girl, "Let's Get it On" like the slow jam
To everybody that I'm runnin down the road with
Y'all my family, I know that you know this
Fox, Rock, B's and Chaos
Y'all growin up with me man, true to life players
Grandma or grandpa watchin up above
Trademarc you my heart cousin, nothin but love

[Trademarc]
Thanks momma, for all that you was
You a strongarm lady baby crazy with love
My sister raised me, those are the facts
And taught me how to rebuild when the order collapsed
And right now I'm blessed no stress no less
And thanks hip-hop for givin me back focus, huh
Yeah John, what can I say?
It's all love from day one, you showed me the way

[Chorus]

Yoyoyo!.. I'll be gone soon..Go and be a real man.. just a matter of weeks.... this is crap.. right.. well i guess i better go grab a bite.. peace~

2005-08-04T22:30:00.000-07:00

dawn nv looked so beautiful..
L ast night i dream of u again.. weird huh?i remembered u told me once u luv this color.. cos its good for eyes eh? heh..I soon will be goin le.. though not far from u but still.. kinda far to me at least.. like i said b4 i will take care de.. also anyway we r looking at the same moon.. so dun worry ya? i realli wish u could make it on 8th of sept though.. cos i noe 9th of sept u mayb got sch.. any way its in da mornin so i dun tink u can make it anyways.. XD// anyways.. today realli quite upset.. cos u finally online and find me.. but i.. but i was not available.. i come back to find u.. but u were offline.. *sigh* Mayb it was'nt fate.. or mayb fate has sumthing in store further? lol.. god noes.. frankly speaking.. yur the last face i want to see b4 the gates shut behind me at jurong camp.. guess i hab to keep on praying then ^^ I pray and i cried.. that sumday u could be mine..

2005-07-30T16:20:00.000-07:00

look i am flying~ the night is so B.E.A.U.tiful
Hehz.. i today wake up weird lehz.. my chest hurts so much.. like sumthing had happend.. at that very moment i could not breathe.. then i realise cos i slpt on top of my bolster.. the darn thing was below my chest the whole night.. no wonder so pain.. tot sumthing had happen to the person i loved.. lol ><|| k la.. now i updated time to go bathing.. lala~

2005-07-27T16:26:00.000-07:00

Statue of Shawnism~:P
haha now i am playing a new game.. kinda cool.. cos u can fly ard on hover boards or brooms.. nope i am not talking abt asd hover board game.. i am toking abt flyff game.. Fly For Fun now i am oni a lvl 19 mercenary (tink is spelt this way) heh.. the character is cute.. simlar to rose online.. but has the feeling of rangarok online though.. is very cute.. i experimented wif my sec sch juniors and frens.. they all say its a nice game.. so i recommand this game to all my fellow mmorpg frens out there ^^

2005-07-21T18:11:00.000-07:00

Cute right?
hehe today i had the weirdest dream.. actually this few days i had the same dreams.. everyone i knew was in my dream..include zhiwei, you wen,jismyl,rebecca,louis etc.. u get the pic.. suddenly all in cdss wor.. weird right... duno y but all same class de.. haha then we were toking i duno wad we were toking cos its like watching a muted tv.. i canot hear but sumhow i noe wad they r saying.. then suddenly we the guys r fighting and the gals well.. they r crying.. i looked at jismyl cos she is crying the loudest :x omg... she turn into a baby gal.. cute nehz.. :x anyway i imeddiately look at the other gals... all of them r babies.. all wailing thier lungs out.. i turn to the guys for help.. they became kids too.. playing wwe cards!! omg.. this is crazy man.. in my mind i asked y is this happening... suddenly all turned quiet.. and looked at me in a cold stare.. in a united voice they chanted and ranted.. its all your fault.. the next thing i rem.. i fell off my bed and knocked my head hard.. till now still painful nehz..k la.. i better go find f.i.r songz le.. hehe ja~

2005-07-21T02:57:00.000-07:00

hehe Introducing~ *drum roll* my perfect gal.... sohee!! of course she's not real.. if real still perfect meh? =_=|| haha she is just so darling..hehe..she will proclaim her love to me.. as i die.. or she will greet me wif enthu if i log on.. man.. wad a woman... she sure noes how to make a man fall head over heels.. all those of course is A.I programming.. but compare to other players of r.o, their pet sux.. :x not course of lvl.. but their pet ain't cute.. like isis for instance.. she is a busty woman wif a snake body.. but.. she is not cute though..i prefer cute gals then busty babes.. haha duno y.. i ain't like common man.. it seems.. heck but i ain't a fag.. haha |>.<| speaking of r.o my assasin finally reach lvl 78.. just 20+ more lvl to go to reach my goal.. jia you ba.. i must slp le.. damn tired.. and tomorrow is louis last day le.. all the "gay partners all left.. oni left me.. the sole survivor!! but i too will be gone on 9th of sept.. the irony is, it's a month after the ndp! majam asking me to go clean up wrk.. -.- k la.. i realli needa slp! slp!

Muackz ^3^

2005-07-18T23:17:00.000-07:00

Haha bad ass s.o.b see my character? still smoking~:P
Hee... here's sum more pics of my r.o experience.. i got a lvl 63 crusader.. which is kinda a wanted man.. by most gamers.. of a particular guild.. cos i "murderlise" haha or in game term.. pk them alot.. in this private server of r.o players whu r killed dropped their skull... haha.. and i am sort of a bounty hunter.. i collect the skulls of players i pked hee.. below is more pics..

Hehz.. my sample collection of skulls.. plenty where that came from.. *smirk*

Hehe mage waiting for wad nehz? i also duno.. posing la..

Posing wif my crusader.. when i was lower lvl..

Same as usual posing when i am a swordsman..

Latest mage.. yandao hor? haha wif my trusty rabbit~ Snowy *taadaa~*

2005-07-17T12:26:00.000-07:00
Haha it's Ro Season again.. wee~ duno y i rather play r.o then maple.. cos mayb i dun like maple.. haha r.o is the grand daddy of cute games.. and the stupid slime from maple is ripped off from r.o, it looks so much like poporing and the mushroom looks like spore.. from r.o grrz.. this r a few screen shots of r.o hehe.. now oni a low lvl of 41.. i am a thief now.. i duno i wana change job to assasin or rouge.. man..

cute hor?

Heez.. got a cute kawaii babe in kimodo~

Haha i am so bo liao.. dressed up as Anbu.. and luving the babes..haha
P.S Those interested to play r.o pls play wif me.. or if u noe me.. u can ask me to send u the excaliber patch.. my avalon a/c gana hacked le.. damn hackers..

2005-07-11T14:40:00.000-07:00

Sg Idol Participant
Just now i got another weird dream... not abt a gal.. this time.. haha u will never guess it.. cos its about a arcade! omg.. y did i dream abt arcade? weird huh?

I was there playing arcade with my friend.. then suddenly we were playing The King Of Fighters then we were playing happily then i realise my buttons were seperated.. like this..

Weird huh?

Soon i feel sick of that game then i went alone to play OutRun 2 but weird, the machine accepts only 1 dollar worth of tokens.. so i went to the counter then ask for a change of 1 dollar for the tokens.. the uncle looked at me funny then said now adays no body changes that petty amount anymore.. now minimum is 30 bucks...

Next thing i noe.. i woke up le.. cos my handphone got sms haha i read it it was from leng.. he complained abt his training in his maju camp..(tink is spelt this way)which makes me envy.. I for once... miss the good old days wearing the No.4 uniform and push ups and marching together with everybody.. when i was just sec1 i was amazed on how people impose the All For One and One For All motto..guess it gave me a sense of bonding with my frens or bunk mates or sumbody.. heh..Remember the days when wake up early in the wee hours.. just to pump us b4 go jogging like mad then go for breakfast.. then 5 mins of bathing time and all of us were screaming our heads to rush ppl.. so that we wun suffer the wrath of the sgts.. haha

The days of arms is realli quite fun.. we carry m16 around go live firing that was when i was hooked into firing m16 and striping and assembling the weapon.. cos i was the top notch rifle striper and assembler then..ppl gave 1 min to strip and assembly.. i took abt 40 plus second.. haha but i think now canot le.. forgot alot of basics.. when the day i passed out as sgt ..i was happy and excited.. cos i wanted to bring my sch's cadets into a higher position then i had been.. guess i wanted to express my thanks to the sch for making me into a man, in a way .. and when the days of camo are over.. we,the ncos felt sad leaving each other.. and graduating haha k la enuff abt this.. i gotta grab me sum grub.. so hungry man.. ciao~

2005-07-10T12:02:00.000-07:00

heh heh.. sianz man ppl.. i'm back.. y am i sianz? u might think.. cos.. my moutrh injured... cos got into a tiny conflict wif my cousin lo..he wana spar wif me to test his skills ma.. i nv treat the sparing seriously cos he oni sec sch...sec 2 sumore.. but he was quite a bulky person.. then we started.. he did a no of round hse kicks and i block it or swipe it away in ease.. then changed to forward kick.. i managed to evade it..but when he did the turning back thrust.. duno y my mind suddenly tot of her..most ppl will noe who.. but i wun say it out loud.. heh heh.. dissapointed? dun be.. :P thats when the accident happened.. next thing i noe i felt the most painful defeat of my life i was staring at the ceiling.. my mouth is throbbing and blood flow out of my bursted lips.. my gums r swollen too.. damn painful.. but i din blame him la.. cos i lack.. how do u say? hmm.. ah! concenration? meditation? u noe de.. just woke up not long.. now i go play game le.. ciao...

2005-07-06T22:38:00.000-07:00

today kinda depressing,cos of last night the ppl whom i tot as frens looked dwn upon me.. in sec sch they 4a.. but tat does'nt mean they damn smart.. they r oni hard wrking bunch of retards following the rules.. tats all.. i am just plain lazi tats all.. tat does not gibe them the damn right to looked dwn upon me..then just now mum come in tell me abt her prob sumore.. so fan! FAN! realli wish i can stay sumwhere near the mountains.. then can blow against the wind.. ahh shiok.. i realli detest my sisters more and more... married out le looked dwn upon my family.. esp my eldest sis.. knn dulan cos my mum told me.. all the bad things she said abt me and my family... ppl say being the youngest is good.. true.. but not if u r the only son..... imagine this yur two elder sista married out.. u r the youngest.. how can u yang yur family? the pressure i get form everyone is canot been seen nor touched.. others canot even detect it.. only i suffer silently.. i wish to be alone.. cos even in my heart i wanted a gf.. how can i yang her? i can;t even cope wif this things i can't say i can cope wif another mouth or sumthing like that.. it seems i hab matured in sumways.. yet i feel its not enuff.. i am still an infant in my heart matters.. i need sum1 to realli reach into my heartful of darkness and pull me into the light.. as in the picture.. right now i am feeling so much pain!!..
The night is most assuring

2005-07-02T20:42:00.000-07:00

today is jismyl, mao mao bday... i just came back from her house dwnstairs.. gibe her her present ma.. its a jigsaw picture of a cat.. not the same as abv.. but its cuter.. she likes it alot.. she got all her frens celebrating for her.. which set me thinking.. must be fun to hab all yur frens celebrating yur bday.. .. i tot abt it .. my bday.. not realli many ppl celebrated for me.. kinda sad man.. she got alot of gifts this yr.. got another guy his gift is bigger then mine.. i kinda dishearted.. but she say nvm la.. its the tots ma.. she looked relli happi when she opened my present.. hehe ^^ yes! though i wish i noe whu my true frens ah.. not those luff luff oni de frens.. but share experiene abt life de those type.. like zhiwei.. and you wen.. they i can say are my best frens.. cos they share hardship and happy times together.. in da past la.. now not study together abit hard la.. but still crap abt lol..

2005-06-29T19:31:00.000-07:00

hehe long time nv blog.. frankly i duno wad else there is to tok abt.. i been rotting and slacking alot.. abit of wrk here and there.. or else i stay at home hiding from the sun.. slpin at home and playing games.. haha i put on su weight le haiz... from 69 to 72 kg le.. gosh.. time to go slimmin le.. hehe..

2005-06-23T20:20:00.000-07:00

haha long time no see~ wahaha.. i now adays alot of things to fan nao.. got to help.. other ppl to wrk.. help other ppl to do blog~ right? si piggy. lol.. anyways.. i also feel lost.. like wad i wan in my life? haiz.. i keep wondering y am i those type of person.. whu keep thinking abt past. de.. time to move on ... yay jia you! hehe.. *sigh* duno y my mum today suddenly sick.. she ard 12 or 1 am vomit.. then morning bring her go see doct... doct say duno y her blood pressure become very high.. play safe ask her go hospital check.. i nv go wif her to hospital cos i stay at home do house hold chores.. like wash the dishes.. and also dad and sis bring her there.. so i can dun worry.. me and her.. got alots of debate and quarrels.. but after all she is my mum.. so i got to do my best not make her angry lo.. ^^ now at home wait fer her good news ba.. k i go do things le ciao..

2005-06-11T01:17:00.000-07:00
sorry ppl i too bz playing a new game to blog.. haha its call phantasy star online blue burst

haha nice game.. cool graphic.. abit futuristic haha i now oni low lvl oni 16 close to 17 le.. alot of ppl playing.. frm all over the world.. haha k la i go play le.. wee

2005-06-03T17:39:00.000-07:00

i wan a ps3~ cos of ff7 .. they remake it.. same.. game plot as the previous one.. but the in game detail and user interface.. wah~ like leng said cloud look so real.. and arieth her.. ahem so real looking also :x ahaha k la.. tom tml go ns le.. i go to have last dinner wif him and leng they all le..ciao

2005-06-02T12:44:00.000-07:00
today super no mood.. 1st of all.. sorry for not updating for so long.. cos my com crashed.. but now i fixed it le.. ya.. back to y am i in such a bad mood.. can say kinda stupid... but i was disappointd in my frens attitude towards me.. normally she wud be friendly de.. out of a sudden.. as i normally wud.. greet her a hi... she replied a wad? so i tot... as i typed a y so fierce? she replied wadever.. this is totally suprising.. cos its been a while since she mood swing u noe.. so i tot i leave her alone for now.. guess wad she replied? she said ya.. thanks y not leave me alone forever? my heart was like yeoch.. man.. i treat her as a fren she treat me as wad? .. so irritating the tot.. i just dun undertsand the other gender.. grrz.. i go rest le.. *goin off*

2005-05-26T05:34:00.000-07:00

today sway lo.. suppose to print scores for jis de.. haha but my com usb ports all siao le.. so canot print.. but i promise le.. so canot break it right? ha so i call all my friends to ask who can lend me use their printer fer a while.. no 1 was available.. omg!! so i no choice had ot beg my sis who is wrking at tuas.. to lend me use her office printer fer awhile.. lucky she agree..so i took dads car and went to her office to roint.. after that it was 6.30.. i meeting jis at 7.. and dad say reach lot 1 will be ard 6.45 so i can relax.. but then it happened! the car broked down! man!! in the middle of the expressway sumore! no way to flag a taxi .. i called jis to tell her i'm gonna be damn late. haha :X then push the car to the shoulder of the road.. so as not to obstruct the traffic.. then in the end no choice.. had to call a cab while dad waited for the tow truck.. the cab super expensive.. -.- but nvm.. i reach lot 1 then call jis.. ask her where she is now.. but seems shes at home le.. haha so no choice had to walk to her hse le.. super tired when reach her hse.. but then i was late.. hee she tot i was at her hse dwn stair le.. so she came dwn eariler and waited fer me fer so long.. haha jis if u see this.. i apologise la..she came dwn.. then i see her abit weird haha.. cos she wear red shirt.. then her face red red also.. not cos she angry.. nor is she blushing.. but she suffer from sun burn.. haha .. cute abit.. then send her to the lift.. then i walked home le.. damn now i hippcuppin non stop... damn.. anyways duno y.. but tink is cos of jis.. now i like to listen to classical music esp piano de.. haha k la.. i go rest le..

2005-05-22T03:45:00.000-07:00
sorry long time nv update.. cos i had been sick.. and slpy.. due to various reasons haha.. at this moment .. i abt to slp le.. my throat feeling super dry.. despite the fact i drank almost the whole flask of water finish.. this means i gonna get sick le man.. super pissed today... today suppose to go cycling.. but due to bukit panjang area raining "too" heavy.. my fren lazy to go out.. kns.. then ltr on suppose to go archery de.. but everybody like dun wana go.. i dun wana let my coach down.. but.. even the best archer dun wana go.. i go like weird huh.. further more.. i sick wif all these people le.. to them like Gods oni exist on chu yi and shi wu ba le.. and of cos vesak day..kns de man.. nv hear frm people.. go eat vegetrain or go temple b4 de.. suddenly all go pray pray.. hypocrites man!! .. god shall not spared thee from his warth.. or rather ma warth.. muhahahaha!! k la.. i let sum of my steam out thru here le.. time to go slp.. nightz.. *poof*

2005-05-19T01:18:00.000-07:00

sorry so long nv blog.. haha to bz studying le... bleahz >< un fair man... others oni got two subject.. i got dbl the amt!! zzz... whu ask me.. early semester nv pia.. haiz.. upset man.. today.. my hp dropped...!! brand new de.. then my cam spoil.. kns man!!not i drop it de.. is he tiao lou..so sad.. i place the fone on my book.. with a smooth surface.. the book is abit tilted to the edge of table.. but i nv pay attention.. my fren sms me earlier ask me go play pool.. i nv reply him.. cos i goin bathe.. but he go call me.. then my fone vibrate then slide dwn the book to the table.. to the floor...tmd de.. super upset man.. tml got erp then ltr i got bs paper.. haiz hope can pass.. kk i go study le ja~

2005-05-09T13:07:00.000-07:00

today i overslpt.. again!!.. cos i suddenly dream about kellyn blog the song.. duno y it just rings in my head.. then i suddenly dream that i was a body guard or sumthing.. protecting a girl.. i tink she's a princess or sumthing.. heh heh... we were in a big castle like alley when suddenly the ground start to tremble... a group of "frens" run past like headless chickens.. saying they r here! run for yur lifes...i was like wondering whos' here? .. i dun need a sec to tink as a big group of man in black clothes rushed towards my princess in a menacing manner.. i quickly grab her hands then made a run towards the only room in the alley, the other guys just slammed the door at my face..i was thinking , hell no.. man.. then grab her hand and run for the lift.. wit the "baddies" hot on out heels.. as we enter the lift.. i saw the goons.. went for the stairs.. i quickly press open in the lift again.. haha.. smart eh.. they went down by stairs as we zoom past the stairs they must hab heard us therfore they rush up again.. (man dun bad guys every gibe up?) we ran to the lobby.. where we were surrounded.. by more goons.., the girl looked at me wif those puppy eyes.. ask me wad now..? i duno where it came from but i had a cigar on my hand.. i lited it and puff a few.. told her not to worry.. as i went to fight head on wit the goons.. u see.. in my dream i smoke the cigar not cos of coolness.. but as a weapon.. haha.. as i "fight" i puffed out the smoke in thier eyes..*smart ba?* hehe.. and if i am in a fix i will use the lited cigar to burn their neck.. haha then they will ahh! then i make them see stars.. haha.. after taking care of those goons.. i grab her hand and made off to the the main door.. i found that it is boltted.. suddenly.. the lights turn offed and a strong spot light showered upon us.. a guy came out of the shadows luffing evily.. said looks like we hab no where to run now.. muhaha *i said guy cos i canot see his face as it is almost pitch black.. and his face is in shadow..*he suddenly snaped his fingers.. then a group of goons appear carrying guns.. all pointed towards us..i'm thinking like , u gotta be jokin.. howcome the bad guys hab the guns the good guy dun.. -.-, anyways..the girl held my hand tightly.. as she was afraid..i looked at her give her my most assuring smile and said.. looks like this is it eh? xiao qian.. *duno y.. this name so familiar i will tell u all y in the next blog*,she nodded her head... as we prepare to face it..the main head of the baddies said.. for MY country to prosper.. i'm afraid u two hab to die.., his last wrds were its nice knowing u two.. as he snap his fingers again... i swear i could see the bullets flying in slow mo.. as it hit both of us.. as i collapse towards the ground i caught a glipse of that guy.. he.. OMG he turn out to be.. ME!! after that i just woke up from my bed realise omfg i overslpt again.. and i also broke out in cold sweat.. ha.. duno y lately i keep having this dreams.. and this gal xiao qian.. mayb its sum1 from my past? hmm.. god noes..k la.. now i go play abit of games le.. tata..(tune in next time) :P

2005-05-08T22:22:00.000-07:00
haha today is a sucky day.. cos raining all de way man.. morning suppose to pei bday gal ivy go east coast de.. haha but archery come 1st.. :X no la.. is i canot neglect my duty as a member lo.. ya but today i let everyone dwn by performin badly.. kns man.. i lose to a gal!!? kaozz normally i could hab score 50+ de today score oni a pathatic 40!!! omg!! all of my arrows spoil.. cos the flech all gone.. kns man.. the sch damn budget oni got a jig left... suppose to hab two de.. one cb( char bor) took it and left one.. but that one give a junior cb( same meaning)le.. kns man.. so i no choice use orange's arrow.. but her arrows are lighter... and shorter! i dun dare to draw and dun even dare to shoot normally le.. totally dishearted man.. by the time i lock in my hand to my chin and neck region.. the arrow almost fell off the arrow rest.. kns man.. pure swayness.. one of my arrow and two of hers.. my arrow fly as i expected it to be.. but hers .. cos diff arrow la.. fly the most funny postion.. not i wana gibe excuses, i asked my ex-president faizal.. he also said.. he last time also gana same thing.. cos "their" arrows are of lighter weight.. thats y we cannot control it well as our " heavy duty" one.. haiz.. i saw the coach gave me the disbelieve face.. wah~ i failed everyone.. haiz.. then on the way to bedok central saw an ambulance in the bus interchange.. and a police car was there too.. duno wad happen.. just saw a man collapse suddenly.. i tio scared.. cos i see him like a lifeless puppet just drop wit his head banging the floor like nth.... louis lame say he die.. haha kaozz.. then went to westmall help shop a hi fi for louis mum's bday and mum day prezzie.. haha louis got scheme de la.. haha buy fer his mum he also can use hahaha :x better dun say more on this ltr he kill me wahaha.. then go eat at the kou fu food court.. then go buy vcds..haha borrow abit of $$ frm louis buy wwe vcd for my family.. louis bought two different vcds for himself.. haha he borrowed my vip card.. haha yeah i got 34 pts added le.. wee~ k la.. now i at home slacked lookin at others blog.. wondering y no 1 bother to tag me.. haiz.. sad case man.. :P i go slp le ciaoz..

2005-05-07T17:00:00.000-07:00

haha guess wad?? i just woke!! haha gana scolded by zoe that i am a pig .. kaozz haha nvm used to it le heez.. hmm i dream alot of weird dreams yest one of them isthat i became a player in a soccer team.. then i am taking a corner kick.. the weird thing is i kick the ball as i wud normally do in real life.. so i expect it to curl towards the penalty area.. mei xiang dao!! it curl a perfect U or rather n(cos this is the way the ball goes).. and it scores!! omg.. am i tian cai or wad? hahaha mayb i see the comic book bowling king too much le.. then also lately i play soccer wif frens thats y.. hahaha.. now already 5 le haha must go study abit despite break fer 1 week.. but i still tired.. haha k people.. i go study le ciao .. poof*

2005-05-02T23:23:00.000-07:00

haha i'm back~ from where? haha work of course.. kns man.. headache week.. i fri wrk not normal time de.. wrk night shift.. go all the way to bedok to work there as? hmm computer caretaker and setup manager.. wads that u might ask.. well basically i open and close the side shows and look after the POSB laptops with there informations stored in there.. haha start at 9 pm i start to close down the show case.. then form there on.. i stay at there in the "tent" till 9 am... man.. tell u u wana pee also canot.. kns.. bladder gonna burst sonner or later.. cos the nearby toilet need to walk abit.. and.. i cnaot leave my postion as ppl can just enter the tent and just kapoke the lap tops or the pc frm dell... worth abt 15k ba.. cos the lcd screen kinda big.. can be a mini tv le...then hab to tahan.. 1st night i tot laptops got internet connection.. till i open them.. damn! u seen b4 a guy play 3 laptops? with the programs.. like solitare, hearts, and pinball? haha boring night!! then 2nd day i smarter..i ask becca burn fer me gba games.. haha then i whole night play the most idiotic game.. pokemon!! haha not bad leh when u r bored.. u play it quite fun! haha pika~

2005-04-21T23:33:00.000-07:00

Today is kinda fun.. haha thurs no sw and oni got one lesson so screw it and then wen msg me ask me go play pool haha then i devised a plan haha :X not plan la.. just try my luck.. i msg linda ask her come along lo.. haha her pool skills not bad eh.. haha if go train can be very good de.. yup.. then i abit stiff lo.. cos weird wif others ard purposly trying to make me nan kan haha.. ya then play quite long lehz.. i paid most fer the game cos i guy wad haha paid 7 bucks.. yet canot be too kind.. so ask her pay 20 cent as punishment fer being late! wahaha lame .. :X ya then went home play gb wif louis haha funni leh gb i off form.. then tio scold haha but got back abit form back.. at the end haha then chat on msn abit then slpt le ya.. kinda weird the more and more i think abt it.. the more i feel another me within me.. jismyl once told me.. i duno the inner you.. man.. that set me thinking.. just who am i within..? sumone help me.. haiz..

happy day

2005-04-18T23:56:00.000-07:00
haha i can hardly control my excitement le..wee.. today went to see sahara wif usual gang, consist of tom,leng,louis and me haha stupid show.. the plot abit lame la.. leng almost wana slp.. so u can see how boring it is...haha then went home play gb.. not bad today abit on form abit.. can win sum matches.. not bad can make louis "sweat" also haha..cos got 1vs1 then alot of cases whereby he or me loses if either of us miss our shot.. lol..then after that i go meet you wen play pool at bt.. she was there again.. haha now perhaps abit lame la.. but its the 3rd time i see her le.. it must be fate haha then heard frm you wen that she din tok to him when he was alone or when wif zhiwei(my another fren) but oni when i am ard she come over then tok.. haha so wad does this mean? haha AND the bt mec master is closing.. omg.. she wun be there any more soon... so i knew today is the time.. TODAY is my chance... i try to pluck courage to ask her no. but her glance just makes my knee shaky...haha.. in the end sad to say...i din ask.. but asked you wen help :X >_< i noe i noe weak ass right? haha sorry but duno y i become abit shy and not goin le leh... haha.. but still i got her no. haha i was just beside her.. then funny thing is she ask if it is i wan or you wen wan? since i was like cooly looking at other ppl playing snooker.. and him asking haha.. now i noe her name is linda~ woo.. haha got her no. le her no. is kinda easy to rem.. it is.. 81****** .. haha tot i was gonna gibe it to ya right? muhaha no way *bleahz* haha feelings are mixed right now.. haha i think i shud go continue my training le.. cos my martial arts course postponed to wed due to instructor sick haha *grinz*

hell of a day

2005-04-17T04:31:00.000-07:00
today suppose to meet louis at bb mrt de at 8.. but sumbody over slpt.. in the end~ i go alone.. haiz ha.. then reach le saw orange and nurul oni.. so i guess i'm early ba.. haha then today kns.. the strong became weak the weak became strong.. man.. faizal the score poor till less then me omg.. haha then went to wm eat wif rebecca lo.. eat mos burger long time nv eat le.. haha.. then went home continue my dmc 3 :P now i luv dmc more and more le haha guess that my character abitlike dante, the main guy .. i mean not the coolness and looks la.. we hab alot in common.. like kinda lonewolf type de... yup yup ^^ then also cocky :P haha then ltr..(oh man i dun wish to put this dwn) amy.. my ex pop in msn... i saw the nick.. it says she's goin to end her life.. i noe i noe.. abit dumb for me to believe.. but wad the heck i follow wad my heart tells me.. and i go kpo lo.. haha abit pissed of by her la.. mayb she matured or sumthing? she so attached to her current bf..she told me alot of luv principles like how u forgive the other partner's faults and all.. man.. i can recite that since i was a toddler man! but since me and her .. our relationship is over le.. so wad the heck.. i din gibe a damn.. i just lol then say ya.. glad u noe.. i help her slove her prob and wish them stay together happily.. ya.. hehz now i go back train winning eleven 8 le.. canot let louis trash me 2-0 must make it draw or at least lose by one.. grzz..

2005-04-11T14:21:00.000-07:00
i tink i finally broke dwn.. i begin to feel paranoid le... i stress till i dulan abit.. bbdc theory i failed.. plus the erp i also failed.. i am so damn sad but tell whu? haiz.. i noe its my fault for not studyin la... but haiz.. canot blame.. i realli duno wads wrong wif me.. everyday i keep losing interest in things.. i hate everyone.. they dun understand me at all.. i can no longer lie to everyone.. i just canot blend in.. forgive me everyone... i can no longer stand the pathatic class which is divided into many groups.. i hab lost all my fighting sprit no more fire to power up my dreams and such le... sad case right? haiz mayb i shud start to seriously take things le.. no more friendly le ba.... i need to noe wad can i actually do.. sorry guys.. i got to do wad i hab to do..

Fights leads to battles... Battles leads to wars... Wars leads to pain... Pain leads to darkness... Darkness leads to solitude... Solitude leads to loneliness... Loneliness leads to fear... Fear leads to insomnia... Insomnia leads to insanity.. And, insanity..................... insanity leads to me

haha soorie worz.. mina~

2005-04-06T22:39:00.000-07:00
haha very very sorry today then blog.. so long nv touch dusty le >_< haha now adays bz wif exams and prjs.. nv blog.. also i nv touch much online game le..cos i bz playing ps2 haha tekken 5 unlock all characters le finally!! muhahaha *evil intent* hahha i so bored... kk end here now.. go play abit of gunbound le.. if not "people" start complaining i 3rd degree oni.. do things oni halfway dun play maple and ko le.. -.-" haha ja~

2005-04-01T00:26:00.000-08:00

haha sorry so long nv update.. cos of health prob loz.. i shan;t go on detail on that.. cos dun wana expose too much :X Today i fergot go sch.. not say fergot is Overslpt lo.. then went to sch to meet sharon.. haha cos she owe me prezzie :P haha in the end no prezzie but a treat to a good meal.. thanks worz! ren must look on brighter side of the world... dun be so gloomy de ^^ then i went home slp abit.. then go out to change ps2 game lol.. then went home do prj. alot sia.. buit manage to do heez.. power ba! :P nowadays nv play kol.. ppl all over taken me le.. haiz.. so sad de.. hee the pic i i take two pics created de.. haha.. k la.. so tired wana slp le oyasumi~ oh ya HAPPY APRIL FOOL!!!

2005-03-30T03:01:00.000-08:00

Haha today was kinda bored... cos nth much to do.. heard frm ppl that cindy wang and Twins are coming to sg to promote thier albumn.. at where? LOT 1!!! haha 5 min walk can le whoo hoo... today play kol till pek chek.. one, lag, two buggy, 3 graphic worse then malaysian server.. play till wana faint..Gunbound.... same.. always meet cocky ppl.. duno y.. play then play la.. tok till i bth abit.. kns.. i cut short my hair le.. haha look so weird.. mayb not use to it ba.. head feel so light..speaking of which.. these few days nv contact her.. and also nv see her ard.. wonder wad had happen... hmm.. haiz.. sigh* wana call her then ask de.. but jiu shi kai bu liao kou rang ta zhi dao~ nvm la.. i believe things will turn out right in the end de.. ^^ mayb influence by louis.. now like twins more and more.. esp ah gill.. wah super chio.. but i prefer my boa more muhaha :x

KOL fever again

2005-03-29T03:42:00.000-08:00

lol guess wad? kol fever is back~!! haha its fun to play that game again.. cos its the oni game i go quite far lol lvl 60+ oni fer warrior and lvl 40+ fer cleric in the malaysia server.. now is a totally free us server.. -.-" though abit lag but still best .. i like~!! lol.. finally my radio blog is up!! YAY!! haha hope u all like the song chichi wo moge~ its frm the anime konjiki no gashbell.. :P it goes chichichichi oppai~ boing boing~ which means pluck pluck pluck pluck bobbies~ boing boing~ haha u all shud go get the anime is very funny... if this song plus the dance... u will faint! haha irritating but super funni.. moge moge moge~ chichi wo moge~ haha peace out i wana slp! :P

2005-03-27T07:33:00.000-08:00

haha guess wad time le? 7.32 am le!! i still awake!! cos play maple la.. lvl slowly.. cos i broke le.. left 70+ k lehz.. waste on mana pot.. cos i spam claw attack lol.. wana slp but canot must at least lvl 20 today... if not hard to chase the rest even though they lvl 30+ to 40.. haha bth soon le~ help ah~

2005-03-26T10:33:00.000-08:00

Din noe wad happen.. today was totally a piss of and fark off day.. like normally i am mild tempered man.. today i easily irritated.. duno y.. must be having those nightmares again i dun dare tell others.. cos i believe they are linked together either my past or future.. kinda scary when all the dreams came true.. sum may say is de javu but how often can u get? everyday? feel so helpless man.. so headache also.. grrz.. i Need a angel to guide me..

2005-03-26T00:15:00.000-08:00
Yo yo mina~ wakalida~ ^^ haiz.. headache week.. i went to genting wif louis jing sheng, tom ,jasmine and other frens.. haha hell of a trip.. fun and cold.... can say is a trip of farts! lol.. cos we guys stay in the same room.. all fart ard.. cept me and tom.. lol i dun fart ard much unless realli stomache... haha leng worst he farting spree lol... *he see this sure kill me* lol haiz.. so toot me at genting.. got alot of chances to noe fabulous gals yet i wasted the chances haiz.. haha met mr cheong there woot his sons are just darlings man lol.. haiz.. was freezing to death there..cos i fergot jacket lol.. haiz.. sneezing there lo.. canot even wear contacts cos too dry lol.. sad manz.. below are the pics of my memories there..

Leng is pouring cheese to his soup while Jasmine is sampling hers~

Louis showing his pai chew style of bowling.. Sugoii Neh~

WOW~ Jasmine and Regina Crying in Fear~ lol..(fake de)

Group Picture wor~

Met Mr Cheong And his two Sons~ Kawaii nehz

DA JIE GOIN BERSERK

Beware!! Two Criminals hab kidnapped Mr Cheong's Two Sons.. and are still at large,Look at them smirk! lol..

3 Yan Daos~ muhaha i was feeling very tired.. so i forced my eyes wide open.. :P

GunBound: Your Dragon Power or MIne?!! MuHAHA

Caught me :( i kidnapped a cute little kid lol... (leng's baby cuzin).. kawaii right?

lol.. after that we went back to sg le.. all tired..then today i wish to register for the media corp wushu class de.. haiz.. but closing date is mon.. no$$ ah.. saddening de loz... my PS2 GAME DATA all corrupted duno y!! !@#$#@! .. but nvm if it is like a test of patience i will gladly play the games all over again.. even though troublesome.. heez.. time to slp le oyasumi~

vroom vroom~ BANG .. DEAD

2005-03-15T23:55:00.000-08:00
today was crazy man.. got bitten by leng.. lol.. not that la.. is just i duno y i wanted to donate blood.. but then i saw the queue i dun wana do it man.. luckily i had been sick fer the past 3 weeks.. so escaped unscathed haha today bo liao in sch... other then that i nv blog for a while is due to sick.. skin infection cos of duno wad.... mum say is urticaria doctor kuku de.. 1st say is urticaria then say is food allergy kns..kaoz.. de.. then today after sch.. go wif louis.. to the bb driving center there go register for theory test.. haiz... dun wana say le.. knn de.. pek chek man.. stupid de.. chose private, now alot of ppl say private not good... then go govt betta.. FUCK YOU ALL, MY DECISION IS MINE... so MIND YOUR OWN AND FUCK OFF.. say wad passing rate low.. i show u all.. GOIN BERSERK LE LA... NEED SLEEP... DAMN STRESS...no one fuckin listens to me.. family hmph.. appear to dote me.. ya.. more like dote u when u follow their will.. like i say i plan to buy a car.. haven finish my sentence they all scream and disapprove of it.. wad i wana say is i plan to buy a damn car wif my damn money in the future when i work.. all of them looked dwn on me in stead of encouragin me.. say if u got work.. ARGH... so wad if they give me money , mp3 players.. when there is no love.. i can dun wan all these.. i just wan a good tok wif them.. but wad do they do.. dad come home sit on couch see tv ignore my existence, mum come home cook.. then complain she tired then go slp.. i nv even had chance to share my tots or problems.. only when the letters from sch or wad ever come in then they start to scream their head off..alot of ppl duno y i dread goin home.. come on.. u all go home wad do u hab at home? mothers at home greet u wif a smile.. me? no1 is at home so quiet so lonely.. even when i come home late.. 1st thing that woman say is u got take my money? or have u taken my bank book? like hell..!!! i said no.. she look at me in disbelieve.. like.. come on.. am i her son?! sheesh.. in the end she found the books hidden in sum god noes where place.. she oni smile at her self saying she forget ful.. but did i hear the S word? none.. not apologetic at all man.. NOT AT ALL... after accusing me.. makin my day bad and all.. enuff of this toks.. wad i realli wan in the future is to move out.. mayb even out of sg settle in a fast moving country like the states .. yah that will be nice... then i will get my self a self modified mitsubishi spyder eclipse unlike in local.. u can't do it.. god damn this place!

Borin

2005-03-08T08:31:00.000-08:00
today i woke up on time and reach sch on time worz.. see xiao xuan sitting alone in the canteen.. i go "da shan" lol.. tok fer a while then her frens come le.. spoiler man... then as i got up she remarked.. where got grey eyes.. toot man.. today assembly i wad fer wear grey de? ltr tio liak ah! tootie xuan xuan lol :x louis, leng and tom nv come assembly.. kaozz.. all bang seh me..they good... so tired man... arms still ache... then no lesson.. thats y i writing here.....tml goin bowlin wif class... got prize de.. duno wads the prize hope is 1 week no need assembly ba lol... then fri need to go saf thingy.. hahaha k la i go slp in class le... heez..

Tired TIRED TIRED!!

2005-03-07T23:44:00.000-08:00
Today oni comprimise of a single wrd.. Tiring~!! haha at sch canot tahan le slpy mood.. then also crappy mood.. most imptly! i am in a very hostile mood!!
haha...
swayest thing my left contact lens today duno y keep slipin goin out of place...then i dulan take out then become kakashi... one eye grey one eye black.. cool nehz.. lol...then went home fer awhile.. then go louis hse after i rest fer like 5 mins.. cos return his contact lens case ma.. then go play bball awhile.. frm play 3 on 3 to 4 on 4 then 5 on 5!! omg.. i super tired le.. now play this 5 on 5 out of breathe man.. kns if i not arms ache.. i could hab made alot of 2 pt shots.. but today unlike yest alot of air balls.. haiz.. then i could also out dribble alot of people.on the 5 on 5 cos they sux! opps.. mayb i got a strong team thats y lol :X.. kns de.. got a guy.. tot he very pro.. when eariler on play 4 on 4.. i treat him steamboat..(rejected him) he said foul.. i swear i oni touch the ball not his hands.. but nvm dun to let matter blown up.. then when he attempt to *qie* me.. i side step (basic kua bu) his knee bang my knee.. he not happi.. he noe is not a foul.. but he not happi.. grrz.. keep thinking very pro.. he is tall oni.. looks like a orang gutan or sumthin like a spider monkey!! lol :P me and louis got a great defense once.. he attempt to *qie* we both closed up and raise up our hands.. he lan lan.. ha.. then play finish 5 on 5 i go home now typin this... ya also i tokin wif a good fren hazel Chee haha y i empathise on chee? cos she said call her miss chee wad lol... duno y also.. tok to her very relax got alot of crap to tok.. not like most gals.. nth to tok abt de.. lol.. mayb she very out goin ba.. heez... k la.. almost 12 am le.. i go watch my fav anime Go and gashbell le.. ^^ ja~

A bday without her

2005-03-05T22:28:00.000-08:00
yest was a borin bday.. cos despite the fact that louis and jasmine went to see hitch with me... it was still missing sumthin... i think perhaps i needed her to be there fer me man.... whu? jis of course... i duno how it wrks... but i just wana feel miserable.. u noe? like deep dwn.. like dun reply my msges and dun bother me at all.. it drives me crazy and happy at the same time when she met up wif me and the smile just makes everyother thing dun matter at all.. you r just lost in a space with her in yur view..Its weird actually.. when everything just seem so right and yet when she's there everything actually does'nt work right.. and when u look deep into her eyes.. u feel stronger and yet at the same time weaker , afraid and yet at the same time excited.. it just amaze me.. *clear throat* anyways let me go on...

After the movie we saw mediacorp artist Jaclyn Tay she's quite pretty, and she sings well too... and after that i went home cos my family had prepare to take me out to eat buffet to celebrate my bday.. the place we went to is not wad i had in mind.. my mum ask fer a change of location from where we use to eat.. go to a super retro resturant to hab steam boat buffet.. the food variety of food is little.. and the music can be recgonize oni by my dad and mum.. mum and dad said that next yr no more comin to this place any more.. lol.. thanks guy for the nice bball i like it alot.. time fer me to slp~

Boring

2005-01-14T14:18:00.000-08:00
so bored.... ltr got archery.. haha lucky i not shooting... i am goin to fix my new arrows... eariler on i pass my fav comic dragon drive to xuan xuan..lol... :P she lend me a gal comic.. but i so gd nv lend her my must b 18 to read comic :X *zip* lol
any way.. dragon drive is nice la... better then a comic h3 sch or sumthin .. like f4 like that... @.@" bth... lol..now adays i like an anime actually is two animes they are hellsing and gashbell.. lolngashbell is very dumb yet cute show la.. but hellsing makes me think.. are we humans realli alone out there? or are there actually vampires out there? hmm.. *shiver* i wish i can be born as one though.. lol.. turn to mist or bats.. cool! as fer the blood consumption.. well.. make it a diet blood :P lol.. A+ oni lol.. fell so slpy in the day ..

2005-01-14T14:00:00.000-08:00
yoyoyo fellows woo hoo i'm back~ sorry nv update cos com dwn wor... so pai seh :x well its been a hell of a yr in 2004 but in 2005 i will try to make it out on my own ~! hmph yes i will!

SICK SICK

2004-09-23T11:15:00.000-07:00
haiz been a while since i last blog... today is very sway lol.. down wif a heavy case of flu.. lol.. yest went to gombak to see leng csc matchup.. haiz at 1st is doin well de.. but suddenly wif a sudden twist of fate.. they lose over 20 pts to toa payoh csc also got a asshole that made leng fell haiz.. look like a total retard an..now adays i'm like total demoralize man.. alot of things turn out to be so sickening ..

2004-08-22T17:10:00.000-07:00
hmm.. ok la.. today was feelin kinda alright, this songs kinda attracts me.. and yes i do admit i liked my cuzin fren.. below.. haiz we were kinda close but hard to open mouth leh.. i duno la kinda messed up..

Here's how it goes, you and me, up and down at this time
We'll get right, where to fight
Cause love is something you can't shape
When it breaks
All it takes is some trying

If you feel like leaving
I'm not gonna make you stay
Soon you'll be finding
You can run, you can hide
But you can't escape my love
You can run, you can hide
But you can't escape my love

So if you go
You should know
It's hard to just forget the past to pass
It was good, it was bad but it was real
And that's all you get in the end of the matter

Here's how it goes
All it takes is some trying
You can run, you can hide
But you can't escape my love

2004-08-22T04:51:00.000-07:00
haiz too tired to blog le now morning le la.. haha yest slp fer 12 hrs.. cos the flu is like major outbreak dude.. ha.. kinda sick of luv too.. haiz.. cos of a gal i mange to see the real hideous side of humans.. humans esp the skeptical and those of untrue heart shud just die! bwahaha.. go slp le.. *poof* *Snore*

hee my dream gal.. lol :P

2004-08-21T00:45:00.000-07:00
Today is a very boring day.. rayne has'nt contacted me fer lets see, 2 days? i realli kinda miss ger though.. haiz.. how? die man.. alot of things happend haiz.. i am motivated by hate yet blinded by love.. wad am i?